Lawndale Fair II: Beavis, Butt-Head and... Upchuck
by Warpedkjh13
Summary: Daria, Tom and Jane run into the little weinerheads again and this provokes a lethal barrage of (gasp) memories.


BEAVIS, BUTT-HEAD AND... UPCHUCK?  
  
written by Warpedkjh13  
  
-------------------------  
  
This fan fiction is a sequel to my first Daria fan fiction, Daria's Run. It is focused on the school fair in which Daria's Run was told. The flashbacks are set inbetween the Beavis and Butt-Head are Dead episode and the Beavis and Butt-Head Do America movie.  
  
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SCENE ONE: ANDREA'S PSYCHIC STALL  
  
DARIA: There has to be something interesting here.  
  
TOM: Want to borrow my cape?  
  
(They walk off and they come across a giant stage. Ms. Li is on it, presenting a band. There is a curtain, so we can't see the band.)  
  
JANE: What the?  
  
MS. LI: Students! Your attention please. The town of Highland-  
  
DARIA: Oh my God...  
  
MS. LI: -has come to sing us The Star Spangled Banner.  
  
(The curtains open to reveal Daria's whole class from Highland. Mr. VanDriessen is conducting the class. Beavis and Butt-Head focus on Daria.)  
  
BUTT-HEAD: Whoa!  
  
BEAVIS: Is that...  
  
BUTT-HEAD: Daria! She looks... uh-huh... different.  
  
DARIA: Oh no... not now... please GOD!  
  
JANE: You know these nut jobs?  
  
TOM: Highland... didn't you say that you moved from there?  
  
(Daria is frozen to the spot with a shocked look on her face.)  
  
JANE: Daria? Daria?  
  
(Daria faints. Fade to black, then fade in again.)  
  
JANE: She's coming to.  
  
BEAVIS: Diarrhea, cha cha cha!  
  
BUTT-HEAD: Shut up, dude, she's like, dead!  
  
TOM: Go away.  
  
BEAVIS: Who are you?  
  
JANE: Her boyfriend.  
  
BUTT-HEAD: Whoa! Heh heh heh. Diarrhea's scoring?  
  
(Tom whacks Butt-Head in the face.)  
  
BUTT-HEAD: That's it. I'm gonna kick your ass!  
  
(Tom holds Butt-Head back. Daria sits up and smacks Butt-Head.)  
  
DARIA: What a nerve you have. First you come here, where I was living peacefully without you, get into a fight with Tom? You guys are seriously stuffed up.  
  
BEAVIS: Heh heh. Daria kicks ass. Heh heh.  
  
(Upchuck walks up. He sees Butt-Head sobbing.)  
  
UPCHUCK: Why hello there, Miss M. Do tell me... what have you done to poor old Butt-Head?  
  
DARIA: You know them?  
  
BEAVIS: Whoa! Heh heh. It's Chuck.  
  
UPCHUCK: Hello Beavis.  
  
DARIA: Did you live in Highland?  
  
UPCHUCK: Oh no, Daria. My uncle lived next door to Beavis and Butt-Head.  
  
BUTT-HEAD: Heh heh. Anderson sucks.  
  
BEAVIS: Yeah. Heh heh.  
  
DARIA: Then why didn't I ever see you around Highland before?  
  
UPCHUCK: I'll tell you why...  
  
SCENE TWO: FLASHBACK: RUTTHEIMER CAR: ON THE ROAD TO HIGHLAND  
  
MRS. RUTTHEIMER: You will stay away from the streets. Don't answer the door if anyone knocks.  
  
MR. RUTTHEIMER: Don't talk to any girls on the phone, tempting as it may be.  
  
MRS. RUTTHEIMER: And stay away from Burnum and Bringhod.  
  
LITTLE UPCHUCK: Beavis and Butt-Head?  
  
MR RUTTHEIMER: Whatever!  
  
SCENE THREE: FLASHBACK: ANDERSON'S HOUSE  
  
(Anderson waits outside for his sister, his brother in law, and his nephew. They pull up in the garage, behind the caravan.)  
  
ANDERSON: Hello.  
  
MRS. RUTTHEIMER: Thomas, how are you?  
  
ANDERSON: Not too bad.  
  
MR. RUTTHEIMER: Have those boys done anymore damage since we left?  
  
ANDERSON: Oh, terrible tragedy. The boys passed away not a month ago.  
  
LITTLE UPCHUCK: (gasp)  
  
MRS. RUTTHEIMER: Good riddance to bad rubbish.  
  
ANDERSON: The house is oddly not for sale though...  
  
(Little Upchuck gets an idea. He runs over and knocks on Beavis and Butt- Head's door.)  
  
LITTLE UPCHUCK: Pizza!  
  
(Beavis and Butt-Head open the door.)  
  
LITTLE UPCHUCK: Whoa!  
  
BEAVIS: Chuck! Heh heh.  
  
BUTT-HEAD: Heh heh heh.  
  
LITTLE UPCHUCK: I thought you guys were dead.  
  
BUTT-HEAD: Uh... heh heh heh.  
  
BEAVIS: Uh... like, I don't remember dying.  
  
(Butt-Head smacks Beavis.)  
  
BUTT-HEAD: You dumb ass! Heh heh. Remember when we were playing hookey?  
  
BEAVIS: Uh... no. Heh heh.  
  
MRS. RUTTHEIMER: Charles! Get away from there! You are to sit in your room for the rest of the trip!  
  
BUTT-HEAD: Heh heh. Mrs. Rutt-Heinie. Heh heh.  
  
BEAVIS: Heinie. Heh heh.  
  
SCENE FOUR: HIGHLAND STAGE  
  
VANDRIESSEN: Daria, what an unexpected surprise.  
  
DARIA: Oh no.  
  
O'NEILL: Hello, Mr. VanDriessen. I'm Timothy O'Neill. I'll be showing you around Lawndale High.  
  
VANDRIESSEN: Yes, well, let me just stop at the toilet first, mmkay?  
  
O'NEILL: Uh... sure.  
  
(They walk off.)  
  
DARIA: Well, there's one third of torture gone.  
  
JANE: But what to do with the other two?  
  
BUTT-HEAD: Can I like... heh heh... sleep with you?  
  
BEAVIS: Heh heh... (singing) All night long, all night!  
  
UPCHUCK: Grrrrr.  
  
(Jane and Daria run off screaming.)  
  
BEAVIS: Come on, let's go find some chicks.  
  
(Beavis, Butt-Head and Upchuck walk off.)  
  
TOM: Daria, Jane, wait up!  
  
SCENE FIVE: FASHION RUNWAY  
  
QUINN: This fair is so disgusting.  
  
SANDI: I know. They should have had more color sense.  
  
TIFFANY: Greens... ewww.  
  
STACY: (breaks down crying): It's so unfair.  
  
BEAVIS: Whoa! Heh heh. Check out those chicks.  
  
UPCHUCK: Mmmm, the fashion club! Grrrr.  
  
BUTT-HEAD: We're gonna score!  
  
QUINN: Horny ugly boy at five o clock.  
  
SANDI: Abandon ship!  
  
(They jump off as Beavis, Butt-Head and Upchuck run after them.)  
  
SCENE SIX: LOCKERS  
  
(Tom, Daria and Jane are sitting against the wall.)  
  
TOM: So, tell us about Beavis and Butt-Head.  
  
DARIA: Well...  
  
SCENE SEVEN: FLASHBACK: BEAVIS AND BUTT-HEAD'S BACKYARD  
  
BGM: Vicious Rumours - Alice Cooper  
  
DARIA (V.O.): This one time, the guys were trying to grow corn in their backyard. Instead of feeding it, they stomped on it. This is where I came in.  
  
(Daria is giving them advice on growing corn. We can't hear her talk. She walks away, leaving Beavis and Butt-Head to stomp on the corn.)  
  
SCENE EIGHT: FLASHBACK: HIGHLAND HIGH HALL  
  
DARIA (V.O.): And another time, when President Clinton gave a speech at Highland High...  
  
BUTT-HEAD: Testes, testes, one, two... three?  
  
(The crowd groans. Clinton chuckles.)  
  
SCENE NINE: FLASHBACK: MAXI MART  
  
DARIA (V.O.): They actually got an award for that, much to Principal McVicker's dismay. Oh, and there was this walkathon...  
  
(Beavis gets brain freeze.)  
  
BEAVIS: Yaaagh! Yaagh!  
  
BUTT-HEAD: You dumb-ass, you have to pace yourself.  
  
DARIA: Learning to drink from a cup, Beavis?  
  
BEAVIS: Shut up... Diarrhea. Heh heh.  
  
DARIA (V.O.) I left them thinking that they ripped me off, but actually...  
  
SCENE EIGHT: FLASHBACK: WALKATHON H.Q.  
  
MR COBB: He He. Good job Boys, you made it. Your friend Daria already gave me the fifty cents she pledged you. So if you ante up the hundred bucks apiece that you pledged her, we'll be all squared up. You two are fine young people.  
  
BUTT-HEAD: Uhh. Could you like, give us our money now?  
  
BEAVIS: Yeah! Give us the money!  
  
MR COBB: Don't tell me you boys weren't planning to pay.  
  
BEAVIS: I thought we ripped off Daria, Butt-head.  
  
BUTT-HEAD: Uhh. Huh Huh Huh.  
  
MR COBB: Boys, when you play the Christian Businessman Association for fools, you play the Lord for a fool.  
  
BUTT-HEAD: Uh, could you like, shut up?  
  
BEAVIS: Yeah!  
  
MR COBB: Now, because I am a Christian, I won't strike you. But, because I am a businessman, I will see to it that you walk off this pledge at a rate of five cents a mile between you. Now let me see, that will be four thousand miles. You better get started, boys.  
  
BUTT-HEAD: Uh huh huh.  
  
BEAVIS: Um, ah, What?  
  
DARIA (V.O.): The day I left Lawndale was the time my teacher got beaten up while singing a song to us.  
  
SCENE NINE: FLASHBACK: VANDRIESSEN'S CLASSROOM  
  
VANDRIESSEN (singing): Flying high, lesbian seagull-  
  
(Some SWAT team people come in and beat up VanDriessen. Daria can be seen running away.)  
  
DARIA (V.O.): Things like that happened all the time in Highland, but in this case, Beavis and Butt-Head were on the lam. The main reason we left was because of the uranium in the drinking water. Afterwards, I read in a newspaper that Beavis and Butt-Head were trying to operate a microwave in the Maxi Mart, which then blew up, destroying the store, but miraculously not harming anyone. Unless you count Beavis and Butt-Head, who had to go painfully without burritoes.  
  
SCENE TEN: LOCKERS  
  
JANE: You have quite a history with those two, Morgendorffer.  
  
TOM: I'm impressed they're not trying to have brutal sex with you.  
  
DARIA: They were put off by you trying to have sex with me.  
  
TOM: That sounds fair.  
  
JANE: I wonder how much carnage those two have done?  
  
SCENE ELEVEN: SCHOOL OVAL  
  
(Kevin is playing football with some of his friends, with Brittany cheering. The Fashion Club knock him over.)  
  
KEVIN: Ow!  
  
BRITTANY: Oh, Kevvy!  
  
(Kevin is then trampled by Beavis, Butt-Head and Upchuck, chasing the Fashion Club. Butt-Head spots Brittany and goes back to her.)  
  
BUTT-HEAD: Hey baby. Heh heh. Wanna do it?  
  
BRITTANY: Eeeew! Get the hell away from me!  
  
KEVIN: You leave her alone!  
  
(Kevin punches Butt-Head, who punches Kevin back. Soon, all of the boys {except for Upchuck and Mack} are fighting.)  
  
UPCHUCK: Feisty.  
  
MACK: What a pointless battle.  
  
JODIE: Wanna go get some cotton candy?  
  
MACK: You're buying.  
  
(Daria, Tom and Jane walk up.)  
  
DARIA: What happened here?  
  
JODIE: Kevin got into a fight with some kid from Highland. Broomhead or something.  
  
JANE: You mean Butt-Head?  
  
DARIA: If you ever mention that name around me again, I will poke out an eye.  
  
MACK: Oh the humanity of it all. Wanna get some cotton candy? Jodie's buying.  
  
DARIA: It's about time I had a sugar rush. Let's go.  
  
QUINN: Hello? Four cute girls here!  
  
(Joey, Jeffy and Jamie are running up to Quinn in a flash.)  
  
QUINN: Let's go.  
  
(They all walk off.)  
  
SCENE TWELVE: COTTON CANDY STALL  
  
DARIA: This stuff is way too bright for me. On the other hand, it will rot my teeth.  
  
JANE: That's the good thing... oh look, here's Trent!  
  
TRENT: Hey Janey, hey Daria. Hiya, Tom.  
  
TOM: Hey Trent.  
  
TRENT: I'm bummed.  
  
JANE: Why?  
  
TRENT: Mystik Spiral broke up.  
  
DARIA: Oh, well, I'm sure you'll get back together. Look, here's Max and Nick now!  
  
NICK: I'm sorry.  
  
MAX: Can the band regroup? We have enough material to make an album, like you said.  
  
TRENT: I have to think about this... where's Jesse?  
  
NICK: He isn't coming back.  
  
TRENT: I don't think I can do it without Jesse.  
  
DARIA: Dilemna dilemna.  
  
JANE: Maybe he's in the fair here.  
  
DARIA: Let's go look.  
  
TRENT: Not yet. I'm too tired.  
  
(Trent falls asleep on his feet.)  
  
--------------------------------------------------  
  
THE END  
  
Continued in  
  
DARIA THREE: THE SEARCH FOR JESSE  
  
(Notice how I saved The Search For Jesse for third? One of my clever ways. Be assured, Beavis and Butt-Head will be here till the last of them.)  
  
---------------------------------------------------  
  
2001 Warpedkjh13  
  
All rights belong to MTV. PLEASE DON'T SUE! 


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